Category: Friendship Calls

Caroline has been receiving the befriending phone calls since September 2022. She has long covid which has left her with brain fog, reduced mobility, and anxiety. It has also exacerbated her COPD. She lives with her adult daughter who has mental health issues. Caroline said she felt she didn’t want to ‘burden’ her daughter with her problems. 

On her referral it was stated that Caroline used to be an avid reader, when she was asked about what hobbies and interests, she had she said that reading has always been a passion but due to Covid she hasn’t been able to get any new books, so her main passion in life had come to a grinding halt. This made a significant impact on her life. After some googling I found out that RMBC runs a delivery service with the libraries in the area which is run by a lovely lady called Debra.

After speaking with Debra who runs this service. We were able to organise the mobile library coming to Caroline’s house with a selection of books covering a wide genre.

After she had received the books, her volunteer said how much of a difference there was in her tone of voice, and she seemed to have rekindled her interests in life. Caroline said she had about 15 books to keep her occupied which should last “about a week”. 

Caroline was so flattered with the fact we went the extra step to help her, and now we are working closely with Debra at library services who will be referring people to the befriending calls and any of our participants who can no longer access books are being referred to her. 

Harry is a lovely older gentleman who lives alone and due to a fall, which broke his hip now has reduced mobility. He gets around his flat using a wheelchair or a frame. He does have family who take him out once a fortnight. On his referral Harry said he often feels down in the evenings when he thinks about his deceased wife and the 2 children they lost. Harry is from South Wales and used to serve in the army. He has always enjoyed telling stories from his army days.

 He has been talking to the same volunteer since he started receiving the befriending calls in May 2022. His volunteer always says how much of a gentleman Harry is and how much she enjoys hearing all his war stories, he has had several near-death experiences including being run over by a tank! The phone calls last a minimum of 30 mins and are normally closer to an hour, their longest call was a whooping 2 and half hours! They have conversed about everything from Harry’s Army days, his family, politics, health and about the monarchy. 

His volunteer enjoys the calls immensely as she has a passion for history and hearing stories from someone who has lived through some of the most important historical events in recent times. The friendship that has developed between Harry and his volunteer really is something special. Harry has said he feels the calls have given him a new audience for his stories and he enjoys them so much because they alleviate some of his loneliness and isolation.

 Joanne has been speaking with Steven for some time now on the befriending service and apparently prevented him from taking drastic measures on several occasions. He is having cancer treatment plus struggles with mental health challenges. The last couple of calls Joanne has made he has been very down, and Joanne have pushed a little hard to have a chat even though he has said he hadn’t felt like talking. A quick 5-minute call because he’s down turns in to a lengthy chat whereby, he perks up, he chats and laughs and at the end of the call always says he feels so much better and that he is glad Joanne kept him chatting. The befriending call service has so many good news stories, and such a vast amount of positive outcomes.

Jean is a very shy and quietly spoken lady, she enjoys making cards and goes to a friendship group once a month. She lost her husband 3 years ago and finds it hard coping, she often gets emotional on the phone and apologises every time. Jean has recently had a cancer diagnosis and should be starting treatment soon. 

Recently her mother has become very ill and due to her own health issues, she hasn’t been able to support her as much as she normally would have done. Her brother and his wife have been looking after her mum which has caused stress for Jean as she doesn’t have a good relationship with her brother.

Jean said receiving the phone calls is a lifeline that she depends on at the moment, she has said just talking about normal things like her weekly food shop and the weather has made her feel “less like an ill person”. She speaks to one particular volunteer, and they enjoy just talking about the seemingly unimportant things in life which makes Jean feel ‘normal’.

Another issue Jean has is she needs a new hip, her surgeon won’t do the surgery until she has lost some weight. Jean has managed to lose three stone since November due to following the Slimming World Diet, she is really proud of how well she is doing. Her volunteer also gives moral support for her weight loss and makes a huge fuss every time Jean reports a loss. 

They have talked about everything from their weekly food shop to the volunteers’ children and how expensive having children is at the moment. Jean enjoys these normal chats so much; she has said it makes her feel like she is living a normal life to a degree. Jean said she is getting used to her cancer diagnosis. She is feeling a lot more positive about her situation. Her granddaughter has just been accepted into college to study law/criminology. Jean is so proud of her, and this shows with how much she speaks about her.

Robert has been volunteering with Rotherfed since August 2022, Robert is a student and is one of our younger volunteers. On average he has been calling 4 people a week, two of these calls are to the same gentlemen each week, Mike and Ken. Robert has started to feel like he is developing a better rapport with these gentlemen and feels like they are beginning to open up to him more about their circumstances and lives. 

At the beginning Robert wasn’t 100% sure of topics they could talk about so said to the recipients “I’m fairly new to this volunteering, so if he you have any preference as to what you would like to talk about let me know” which led to conversation about politics, the monarchy, wars and many other topics. 

After talking to one particular gentleman Robert realised how much they actually have in common despite a 30+ year age gap. Robert said “Yes, I have several things in common with Mike, I think he is getting more talkative, which I’m happy about, it seems like rapport is building”. Their conversations are now flowing over a wide range of topics and passions they both have. These conversations have also widened Roberts interests and he now enjoys watching similar documentaries to Mike. Robert now watches history and adventure documentaries and programmes about wars, which weren’t something he’d never considered before. Both the volunteer and participant have gained a friendship and wider range of interest in their lives. 

Robert asked Mike if he wished to carry on receiving the befriending phone calls which led to the banter between them that if Mike didn’t receive the calls, then he would be ok, but he enjoys chatting to Robert, Robert replied with he didn’t mind as he has plenty of free time, and more importantly it gave him someone to talk with.

Nora was referred to the befriending calls in May 2022. Nora’s husband sadly passed away 4 years ago but Nora hasn’t let this stop her enjoying and living life to the fullest. She loves to have a good chat with her volunteer.

Nora is a very active lady and aims to walk 10 miles a day on her treadmill, which amazed our volunteer whose attitude to exercise was not quite on the same page as Nora’s. Nora has now been able to convince her volunteer to try and get more active and has been constant support with how many steps they have both done a week, they now encourage each other to beat the last week’s step count. The record in one day for our volunteer was 27,462 steps!

Nora and her volunteer have talked about such a wide and varied number of topics, everything from the war in Ukraine and the weather, to how much Nora dislikes films (especially action films). They both also share a passion for motorbikes, Nora was a dedicated rider until her husband passed away. The anecdotes Nora has from her biking days are amazing and hilarious, for instance, trying to go for a wee when wearing leathers! They both share favourite routes, places to go and things to see. Their latest topic of conversation has been about the government and how they both should run for the government and put the UK back in order. Some of Nora’s ideas are a bit wild and crazy but it is amazing for her and her volunteer to be able to chat as they do.

Marie is one of our newer volunteers and she has been with us for about three months now. She does four or five calls a week on average, which she fits in around her family and home life.

Recently Marie lost one of her best friends and asked if she could take a break from making the calls. When we rang to check in and make sure Marie was doing ok, she said how grateful she was that we had bothered to keep in touch and asked if it would be possible for her to resume making the calls and to do extras because she felt that she needed to keep herself busy and fully occupied so she wasn’t sat dwelling on things. During the last few weeks, she has done up to ten calls a week. She has said the calls are keeping her in a good place with her mental health as she is keeping busy focusing on others. Speaking to such a wide range of people has made her feel less isolated in her grief. 

As a result of this we are now aware of how much the befriending calls help not just the participants but the volunteers making the calls as they have a raised sense of self belief and achievement in helping others. She feels like she can always call Ffion or Nicola for a chat if things get too much for her. Marie has said RotherFed does outstanding work and she is proud to volunteer with us.

Clarissa lives on her own, she used to be a nurse before she became a full-time carer to her severely disabled daughter. In recent years she has suffered with a number of bereavements, including the daughter that she cared for and her son. Her only remaining child also has disabilities and needs constant assistance.

Clarissa has previously volunteered as support for people whose children were also disabled and did a lot of work advocating for disabled people’s rights. She has found it hard to accept help, as she has always been independent and the one to help others, she is not used to receiving assistance. However, the befriending phone calls have helped her with her loneliness and the fact that there is someone who rings on a regular basis helps alleviate her isolation. 

She has been speaking to the same volunteer for over 6 months. They both have a love of crafts and genealogy. They regularly spend the entire phone call saying how they could put the world right. The conversations that Clarissa and her volunteer have vary each week covering everything from the war in Ukraine and gardening to aliens and conspiracy theories. Both Clarissa and her volunteer benefit from the calls as they both enjoy the wide range of topics covered and feel like they learn something new from each other.

Joy has been receiving calls since November 2021. She has mobility issues so cannot get around quickly. She has not been out of the house much since Covid started and she hasn’t shown any interest in going out.

Joy does not own a tv instead she spends her time listening to the radio and colouring.

She has incredibly supportive neighbours and friends who do her shopping and even organised for a vicar to come to her house to do communion with her which she hasn’t had in over 2 years! 

Joy speaks to the same volunteer every other week and then alternates volunteers the other week so that she has a wide range of people to talk to, which she appreciates. She is a very chatty lady who can talk about a wide range of topics, she says she loves having her calls especially with younger volunteers as she feels like she is staying in touch with the world around her.